Stop Talking To Me. Please. Just Stop.

So, I was just on vacation in Miami, visiting family. We’ve got a lot going on right now, but since one of my sisters just had a birthday, we decided to take a break and go to a spa in Coconut Grove for massages. (We had a Groupon. Minor digression – I just LOVE all these coupon services, don’t you? I get cleaners, massages, facials, fancy meals… all at rates that fit in my budget for things I normally can’t afford! Okay, digression over.)

They couldn’t take all three of us at once, so I waited while my sisters had their massages. When we checked in, we had noticed a man, probably somewhere in the age range my sisters and I cover, who just wouldn’t leave after his massage, and who was advising the masseuse on what sounding like a really, really, screwed-up relationship in a very loud voice. Well…after I checked in, I went for a walk, and when I got back, there’s that guy…hanging out in the waiting area. For some unknown reason, the (very young) receptionist feels compelled to introduce us, and even worse, he feels compelled to talk to me.

It starts out well enough, but then he starts asking very personal questions, including trying (hard) to probe into my social life. He just could not believe I am single by choice, and made a big point of telling that he is recently single, and aren’t I looking for a man? (He also felt compelled to make sure I knew he’s a lawyer. And Jewish.) And, no, I’m not kidding.


I looked him right in the eye and said “No. Not at all.” He was unstoppable, though, and started asking about my sisters! Are they single, what do they do, and so on. At this point, I really wanted to turn to him and say “We are engaged in a very serious incestuous three-way, and men are not invited”, but somehow, I think he would have found that titillating.

Instead, I again looked him right in the eye and said: “Enough. I just want to read my book.” Believe it or not, he kept trying. So I said again (while already acting on it): “I just want to read my book”. And, oh, I forgot…during this interrogation, the receptionist stepped out to buy her lunch!

Finally he left, but all this makes me wonder… because it happens A LOT… what am I projecting that makes people think I want to talk to them? It’s not just men, either. Once he left, the receptionist started talking to me about her recently failed relationship, and asking for advice. This included reading me the texts between her and the ex, playing phone messages, and so on.

I’m starting to think it’s a plot to drive me crazy…or somehow, in a way I don’t see, that I’m asking for it…but really, all I want is for them to stop talking to me. Please. Just stop!


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